Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Seeing the world in dark and light

Eliza has taken to asking people a very crucial question: “Are you for the Tar Heels or Duke?” Sometimes she assumes that their answer will be yes, like when she told our friend Suzanne, “You must be for the Tar Heels because you’re my daddy’s friend.” Other she expresses her surprise that anyone close to her and her family could pull for Duke, like my mom and stepdad. “Susu and PopPop pull for Duke – can you believe it!?” The choice for her is clear. She asked one of our tutors last week, “Do you like Duke?” When Lindsey said, “Yes, is that a bad thing?” Eliza replied seriously, “Yes it is.”

While some would say child protective services need to be called, it does make me think about how sweet and simple life is right now for my kids. Trust comes naturally, following their parents’ lead is second nature. Whether it’s believing that everyone should like the Tar Heels or that Jesus really did die on the cross for our sins, faith is uncomplicated. I know the day is coming when the world will not be so “dark and light (blue)”. There will be day when Eliza realizes that all Duke players are not evil (I mean, hey, there’s a whole bunch of them like Grant Hill, Johnny Dawkins, and….um…OK, so there’s more than one at least). She will realize that despite his affinity for cheese (being the Rat King), Coach K is actually a brilliant coach (did I just write that – my spell check went bezerk). And there will come a day when she has friends that she dearly loves who also loves the Blue Devils.

It’s silly, but it’s also not a leap to begin to realize that one day questions will come about not only her father’s basketball loyalties but her father’s faith, too. She will soon have friends that she loves dearly who don’t believe in Jesus. She will soon have questions of “why” and “how” that aren’t easily answered in the pages of her Jesus Storybook Bible. She will realize that God doesn’t always cause life to go the way you think it should go, and she will stray from the boundaries of right and test what is wrong.

The world won’t be so dark and light anymore, and as a parent, it will be hard to let her navigate those waters, trusting the Lord to guide her safely home (even if she goes to Duke).


emily said...

Great insights, Marsh. I think about this often as my faith will be stretched as I watch them navigate theirs. Really enjoyed this post.

Motown said...

Well written, Marsh. The only positive thing about not having seen your kids for awhile is that they can't hate me for being a Duke fan.

On a side note, your post made me think about the other "cultural values" that people grow up with that aren't so positive - hopelessness, limited vision of escaping poverty, the norm of broken homes. It breaks my heart to remember the inequity in childhoods that exists. My fight for my kids is to expose them to a diversity of experiences that I never had...even if it means they graduate with honors from that school in Chapel Hill.

Jenny said...

good analogy's cool how much we can learn from children. and i do love learning from your little ones! speaking of that, did you or diane read any helpful parenting books to raise such wonderful kids? kelly wants to know. :)